The Mountain Men is, quite simply, the worst film of the year.

Doesn't even cut it as a made-for-television movie.

The rubber Seymour Cassell head makes it almost worthwhile.

**_Comic booky adult Western about – you guessed it – mountain men_** Two bickering mountain men in 1838 (Charlton Heston and Brian Keith) are fun-loving best friends who haven't seen each other for a couple of winters and the former is disheartened to discover that the market for beaver pelts has gone sour. Together they trap, fight Blackfeet and party at a mountain rendezvous. When Tyler (Heston) acquires a Blackfoot woman named Running Moon (Victoria Racimo) her ex, a ruthless warrior named Heavy Eagle (Stephen Macht), wants her back and will kill to get her. "The Mountain Men" (1980) has a bad reputation with critics, but is generally appreciated by Western fans. Due to its subject matter it's not a conventional Western. There are no saloons, quaint Western towns, Sheriffs, Marshals, cavalries, cattle drives or quick-draw shootouts. "The Mountain Men" takes the topic of 1972's "Jeremiah Johnson" and mixes it with the tone of 1953's "Hondo" and, more so, 1977's "Grayeagle." It's mostly like the latter two in the way the AmerIndians are depicted -- wild and savage. Their portrayal, albeit somewhat cartoony, is neither politically correct nor politically incorrect. It's basically just the way it was. They were either peaceable or brutally hostile depending on the people with whom they were dealing. For instance, the Crow are friendly toward the mountain men whereas the Black…